Friday, August 27, 2010

Memories And More Memories...

We thought of you with love today.
But that is nothing new.
We thought of you yesterday
And days before that too.
We think of you in silence.
...We often speak your name.
Now all we have is memories
And your picture in a frame.
Your memory is our keepsake
With which we'll never part.
God has you in His keeping
We have you in our hearts...

There is not a day or hour that goes by that I still don't think about Heather. I am not sure just how long this will last. Someday..I don't know when..I will realize that I went a few hours and didn't think of her. I am sure it will be a sad moment when I realize that she is slipping from my every thought. I know that day will come. I just don't know when.

Earlier this week I got a new computer for my upcoming birthday. I had been using Heather's Gateway computer. The power cord must have a short as it keeps charging and unchanging every few seconds..very annoying. I took all the files from my old computer and then Heather's computer and put them on my new one. I went through all the files and photos to make sure I didn't have duplicates of them. I began looking at all the photos...Heather with friends, Heather with family, Heather being goofy, Heather with Goofy and Minnie and all the memories of the good fun times she had. Then there were the photos of cancer, hospital, ICU and her funeral. Those are part of her as well but very sad and difficult to look at. So Monday and Tuesday was computer work, looking at all the photos and files and bringing up lots of memories.

Last week I began cutting Heather's clothes to make quilt squares. The first dress I cut was the pink and black dress from our wedding. It was very, very hard to cut the dress. We are taught as children not to cut or destroy our clothes and here I am breaking every rule. To make the basic quilt I need 60-8 inch squares and 80-4 inch squares..four 4-inch squares will make an 8-inch square. This allows me more items to use for the quilt. I am taking photos of all the clothes prior to cutting them so we can look and remember what they were. I used a couple of her outfits as a baby.  It was difficult to cut up clothing that I have saved all these years in hopes of passing them down to her babies. I know that Heather does not need the clothes anymore...but it seems so final to cut her clothes and throw the remained of the cut clothes away.

To find more of Heather's clothes for the quilt required that I go through all of her boxes. I have spent the last 2 days going through all the boxes that hold her things. I found all kinds of wonderful clothes to make our memory quilts with. They are going to be amazing when I am finished. I also have decided to do a t-shirt quilt for me. Heather had so many t-shirts that it seems right to make another one out of her t-shirts. Going through the boxes was bittersweet. Seeing all her things was good but then very sad at the same time. I did manage to get rid of 4 total boxes. A good thing I guess. I have been finding some good homes for some special things that belonged to Heather. I know that Heather would want her friends to have things. It makes me feel good to know that when these people see or use the items they will think of Heather. Another way to keep her memory alive.

Are U Pink? Inc is coming along good. I am officially all finished with the Incorporation part. The articles were printed in the paper for 3 days and I am completely a non-profit corporation. I have my business cards and my corporate seal now as well. Still working on the 501(C) (3) tax exempt portion. We have partnered with United Blood Services and Heather's 1st Annual Birthday Blood Drive is at the Arizona Mills Mall on December 11. The entire blood drive is in honor of Heather. Fliers and posters will have Heather's picture on it. More than I ever hoped for. It will be a huge celebration for Heather's life this year.

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