Merry Christmas, Darling...

Holidays are joyful
There's always something new
But every day's a holiday
When I'm near to you
The lights on my tree
I wish you could see
I wish it every day
Logs on the fire
Fill me with desire
To see you and to say…

What is love? How long does it last? For the 1^st grader seeing his teacher and feeling she is the most beautiful woman in the world it lasts as few days. For the teenager with a broken heart it seems to last for weeks. But for the young couple that fell in love over 50+ years their love cannot even be separated by death.

I recently heard the most beautiful love story that I felt I had to share. It touched me deeply. I only hope I can give the emotions that I felt while the story was told to me last week.

Dale and Ruth Davis had been married for over 50+ years and built a loving strong family full of love and support. The devoted example of these two was an inspiration not only to their 5 children and many grandchildren but to everyone who knew them. One of my last conversations with Ruth was in August 2011. She never met Heather but was so kind to listen to me talk about Heather and express her heartfelt pain for me. Ruth had been having a few health issues and I was asking about how she was feeling. She very matter-a-factly told me she decided she was not going to die first. She had to take care of Dale for he would be lost without her and she didn’t want his heart to be broken at the loss of her. She told me she could go on without Dale, it would be hard but she was stronger than Dale was. This was the most beautiful declaration of love I think I have ever heard. She wasn’t about her and her illness but about her love for Dale.

Ruth’s favorite time of year was Christmas. All the family looked forward to Christmas Eve and Day at the Davis’ house. Ruth would decorate the house, the tree, and make all kinds of Christmas goodies with tender loving care for her family and friends. One of her traditions was Ruth loved to make snowmen out of soda bottles. She gave them as gifts to family, friends or anyone that was kind to her. Several years ago Ruth had very sweetly shared with Dale that while she appreciated his help that maybe decorating the tree with her crystal ornaments should be her job. She also had lovely pink and white lights to adorn her tree with the sparkly ornaments.

With much sadness Ruth died in early January this year. As with most families Mom is the glue that holds that family together. This was the same with the Davis family as well. As the holidays were approaching everyone was concerned about Dale and what he would do for Christmas. Early last week Dale put up his Christmas tree. (Dale and Ruth Davis are the parents of Derek Davis, Bill’s longtime high school classmate.) While I was up visiting with Derek and his wife last week, Derek was talking about his Dad’s tree and what a good job he had done with it. For some reason I felt moved and really wanted to go see this for myself. I asked Derek if he would take me by to visit with his Dad and see his Christmas tree.

Last Friday I had the privilege and honor to go see this amazing Christmas tree. The tree was beyond breathtaking and I would have never imagined that Dale had decorated this by himself. The pink and white lights were placed with loving care around the tree and all the crystal ornaments were very gently placed on the branches. The lights, the beautiful crystal ornaments and the love that stood behind all that was shining in the living room window where it has always been placed was an amazing sight to behold. When asked how he decorated the tree, Dale gets a big grin and said he had help. He told me that Ruth helped him decorate his tree. I told him how much I loved the pink lights and then he shared a story with me.

Several years ago Ruth had told Dale that her strings of pink lights had seen their last Christmas season. They were beyond repair. Ruth had found strings of pink lights at the store but she had not purchased them. Dale asked her why. She told him the pink light were on white wires not green wires. Dale lovingly told her come on and let’s go look. They looked and looked but only could find pink lights on white wires. But Dale had an idea. He bought 4 sets of 100 pink lights and 4 sets of 100 lights on green wires. Once they were home Dale lovingly sat for hours and hours and exchanged all the pink bulbs into the green wires for Ruth’s tree. With anticipation of what she would say when they were all finished and on the tree Dale called Ruth to come in and see her pink lights. A big smile came over her face and she cried…for the pink lights had white bases placed in green wires. She gave him and big hug and said thank you. The pink lights with white bases in green holders were on the tree that I saw last week.

While many of you that have not had a loss of great significance will not understand and think me to be crazy, but I believe with everything in me that Ruth came and visited her loving husband and helped him decorate THEIR tree for Christmas. Just as Heather sat at the end of my bed on the hope chest and told me “it’s okay mom…I am fine”. These are not dreams but actual visits.

Dale will be turning 80 years old on December 9. His whole family will be gathering to help celebrate this milestone birthday. But the love of Dale’s life will be missing, or will she?

Merry Christmas darling
We're apart that's true
But I can dream and in my dreams
I'm Christmas-ing with you..

~The Carpenters~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YR1ujXx2p-I