Outside Looking In........

Standing and looking at the glass window I see all the yummy goodies of the candy store in Downtown Disney. I stand longing to eat one of the delicious candy covered apples from the window.  Well aware that these are not healthy apples, but more like high calorie, diabetic inducing apples. But they all look so beautiful and are oh so inviting with all the decorations. There are so many things that I find myself on the outside of the glass looking in and longing to enjoy once again. With my nose pressed against the glass as hard as I can so that maybe I will be the one laughing and enjoying and not on the outside looking in.

It is dark outside so all the hanging lights glowed very brightly. I stood and watched as the teacups spun with a huge longing in my heart to ride them once again with my Heather. I usually don’t stop to watch very long, but this time was different. As I stood there the ride stopped and the people got off. I watched closely as the new groups of people picked their teacup for the next ride. I saw a pair of gals that were very choosy about just the right teacup. I kept my eye on them and watched them as they got into the teacup. When they sat down I realized I had found my teacup to watch. These gals sat across from each other and had their hands on the spinner in the 12/6 position for the best maximum spinning power. My excitement grew at the same time the ache in my heart began to hurt a little bit more.

It was not so long ago that Heather and I stood in that line, grabbed our best teacup and positioned our hands in the same way. It was our goal to spin our cup the hardest and fastest we could for the entire ride. As our hair flied, we laughed, giggled and talked as we spun our way in the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party. When the ride was over we were breathless like we had just had a workout. I imagined that someone who watched us would have had quite the laugh at the good time we were having. Heather and I are the only ones that could do this ride. It seemed to be the best ride ever with her.

 As the ride began the two gals did not disappoint me as they spun the teacup at their hardest effort ever. Their hair flew behind them as they laughed and giggled. For a moment I was transported back to a time when I was in the teacup and not looking through the glass longing for something that I can never have again. My heart began to hurt. The ride came to an end as we turned and walked away. A smile came over my face of a happier time as a tear came to my eyes to remind me of hurt in my heart that will never heal.