The Sharp Knife Of A Short Life...

"Lord make me a rainbow

I'll shine down on my mother

She'll know I'm safe with you

When she stands under my colors.

Oh and life ain't always

What you think it ought to be,

No ain't even gray,

But she buries her baby."

~If I Die Young~The Perry Band

I love how Disney/Pixar movies can make you believe that monsters only scare you because it is their job to do so. That fish really have homes and children. Cars could possibly live in towns like Radiator Springs and maybe we really do need to visit old towns along Route 66. The longest thing that we have believed in is that toys are real and come to life when we humans are out of the room. If you have not seen the latest Toy Story then I highly recommend you do.

The day "Georgeanne" arrived April, 2009

With Toy Story 3 being fresh on my mind, I have begun to think about Heather's toys and things a little differently. I need to find homes for some things instead of just placing them in the plastic bag that goes to goodwill. For now, I have decided to bring all of Heather's belongs into the house. I may begin to sort through some of them and it is way to hot to be in the garage. When I brought the boxes and bucket into the house I looked at a couple of them. I noticed a couple of friends and I knew where they needed to go. Heather received many treasures during treatment but none more special than Chemo Bear, Princess Bear and Georgeanna Bunny. All 3 of them were made at Build A Bear and were given by 3 treasured friends. Chemo came from South Carolina, Princess was made right here in Phoenix and Georgeanne came from Colorado Springs. Today, Princess was returned to Julie. Chemo will be taking his journey via USPS back to Lynn. I could think of no better place for these treasures to go than back to the ones that loved Heather enough to make them for her. Georgeanne Bunny will be remaining with me and seems happy to be reunited with her bearfriend "Edison". Sorry Sally and George you cant have Georgeanne back. I promise to take good care of her..

I am not sure if people have a sense about when they might die. Certainly I don't mean that they know when they are going to die. I think there is a feeling or a hunch that comes over the person when they are close to dying. The peace of God that passes all understanding. It could be that they feel so badly that they wish they would die. I am not sure about this and I have no Biblical basis for this. In going through Heather's things when she died I found something that rocked me to my core. I remember reading this and sobbing my heart out. Did Heather know that her time was short? Did she have a feeling that she was going to die soon? If she did, she never said a word to me. She would not have said anything to me because in her words she had worried me way to much. She was not about to put me through more worrying and fretting over her. She was unselfish to the very end. Below are words that Heather wrote on March 7, 2009. She would be admitted to the hospital on March 19, 2009. Going back into the hospital I believe she knew. She never ever gave up hope...but I think she knew.

There is a new country group called The Perry Band. This group comes from Alabama. Kimberly, Reid and Neil are siblings that write and compose the songs they sing. The band has a new song out entitled "If I Die Young". They said this song fell out of the heavens as they wrote it on a cloudy day in east Tennessee. They went into the foyer of their home, which has great acoustics, threw up a microphone and recorded a demo. The video was shot on a cloudy day and is more expressive so it can capture the romance of the lyrics without over telling the story. I am not in love with the video, but I still find it captivating to watch. I hope you will listen to the words of the song. It is quite something...

http://www.cmt.com/videos/the-band-perry/521737/if-i-die-young.jhtml