49? Really?...

Heather loved makeup, perfume and designers. Of course all three of those things go hand and hand together. I knew she was very into finding the unique and limited editions of makeup and perfume as well. She once searched every Dior makeup counter she could until she found a limited edition compact of pressed powder. She loved perfume and her favorite statement was that a woman is never fully dressed until she had her perfume on. Heather also loved to wear perfume at night so that her sheets smelled good.

It would of course not dawn on me till after she died that one of the perfume bottles that she had purchased was a limited edition at Victoria’s Secret and it was by Anna Sui. The face or doll shaped bottle line is called “Dolly Girl.” Just like what I would call her, “my little Dolly Girl.” So in 2006 she purchased this bottle and used very little of this perfume.

There are 5 different Dolls in the “Dolly Girl” perfume line:

Dolly Girl

Lil Starlet

On the Beach

Ooh la Love

Bonjour le Amour

“This limited edition for 2006, named Dolly Girl On The Beach, brings us a breeze of tangerine, peach, sparkling lemon, apple, marigold flowers, apricot and bergamot in the opening, mixed like a summer juicy cocktail, followed by the floral heart of freesia, rose and lotus, and ending at the base of a bright tree, amber and musk.”

I remembered in the weeks after Heather died that I looked up Anna Sui and found out the name of the perfume was Dolly Girl. I realized then why she had purchased the perfume; for her love of the beach and for her love of my nickname for her “My Dolly Girl.” I had not really thought about Anna Sui, or Dolly Girl perfume for the last four years. Suddenly a gift for my birthday brought me to tears as I instantly knew then meaning behind the gift. Wendy, Sunnie and Snooks bought me the pink original “Dolly Girl” perfume. She told me that was payback for making her cry at graduation when I gave her the Heather ring.

“Dolly Girl” is a miraculous creation of Anna Sui, in floral fruit composition and was launched in 2003. It is romantic and modeled with a dose of fantasy and memories of the creator, while she was still young, playing with her mother’s perfumes and trying on her clothes. Playful and eccentric, this perfume offers juicy fruit cocktail in its top notes made of bergamot, melon, apple, cinnamon, the notes of elaborate floral garden together with accords of magnolia, rose, lily-of-the-valley and jasmine.

My gift from Jenn, Paz and Babes (Ellie) was photos of my Babes and getting to hold her and enjoy her. I had not seen her in nearly two weeks and I could hardly wait to get my hands on her. She is still just as sweet and cute as she was, maybe a tiny bit bigger but not much. She slept through eating lunch at the India Oven and was awake for a bit once we got back to our house. Mimi got out the playmat and I got to feed her a bottle too. The nicest thing is no diapers and I give her back when she gets fussy. (not really, Mimi takes them even if they are fussy) I got my first card with the baby hand print in it. When Jenn was a baby for my first Mother’s Day in 1986, Bill drew around Jenn’s tiny hand in my card. Since that day every card received by Bill or me always had hand prints drawn in them. It is really nice to see Jenn’s hand, then added Heather’s hand and then all three with Wendy’s hand. I have cards with Snooks hand prints in them and now with Ellie. It is a tradition I love.

look at me..I soooo pretty

Turning 49 was not difficult and I don’t mind sharing my age, it is only a number and not the state of my mind. Several things have changed in the past few weeks. For one, Bill moved back home about a month ago. We are taking it slowly and things are going very good and we are really happy. This was a good time of reflection and growth for both of us. Honestly it feels like we are newly married and trying to get used to living with each other. I believe this was the best thing for our marriage and we will be stronger for this time apart to figure our own selves out. Some people do not understand why I asked for this nor why Bill would put up with this. It has been suggested that he should have just walked away from me and been done. It was never my intention to walk away from over 32 years together and go find someone new. For those who do not understand I cannot begin to make you understand and that is your loss.

Several weeks ago I added jogging to my workout routine. No, I have never jogged nor did I ever think about jogging in the past. I have been going to the gym for over 3 years and have very strong legs and lungs. I took as class my junior year in high school called physical fitness PE and I was expected to run a mile. Even by the end of the semester I could not run the entire mile without walking some. SO I challenged myself one night to go for a run and just see how far I could go and I went for a 1.24 miles. I was shocked as I really enjoyed it and felt great. Then I began running 1.50 miles and now I am up to 2 miles three times a week. Bill had been running with me and we are enduring the heat at night to run. We have our first 5K in October for Be The Match Bone Marrow Registry. Our next event will be the TinkerBell 10K in Disneyland in May next year. We will be running through Disneyland and California Adventure and it should be an amazing run to do. Currently we are running about 11.30 minute miles and that is good enough for me. I have run 3.1 miles or a 5K once and know I can do it. For now this is something fun and different and it gets me out of the gym.

yes I ran during the day. I have more energy and look forward to cooler weather

better than sitting on the couch. We walk 2 miles afterwards too

“Whenever you read a cancer booklet or website or whatever, they always list depression among the side effects of cancer. But, in fact, depression is not a side effect of cancer. Depression is a side effect of dying.”